How do we weep with those who weep when they
mourn those who have caused millions to weep?
This is where we meet our humanity and see both the
beauty and the terror and the in-between.
I’ve seen a lot of ungracious posts about Queen
Elizabeth’s death. While I feel those posts are valid,
I’ve wondered about those of us who are conflicted
and find binary perspectives super difficult?
For many of us who are descendants of colonised
ancestors, it’s difficult to mourn a person who
represents a legacy of oppression.
All too often we’ve seen benefactors of the white
supremacy of colonialism & imperialism become
sainted in their deaths-sins erased. Their silence and
complicity is spun as virtuous. The history they made
washed and rewritten.
So how do we hold space for such a time as this?
Nelson Mandela said, “It is so easy to break down
and destroy. The heroes are those who make peace
and build.” The colonising, imperialism and scandals
were easy. Too easy. The peacemaking, healing,
rebuilding and reimagining are impossibly hard and
heroic feats of perseverance.
There’s a story about a visit Mandela made to see the
Queen. He was given a protocol full of procedures on
how to address her. But upon seeing the Queen
approaching, Mandela broke protocol & called out,
“Elizabeth! You’ve lost weight.” She replied, “Thank
you, Nelson, you don’t look bad yourself!”
I realize others may not agree with this and that’s
perfectly fine: I’m gonna follow Mandela’s lead and
first see the human being apart from the institution
that caged her. And I’m going to weep with Prince
Harry and Meghan Markle and my Hobbiton-husband
and his family.
But most of all, I am going to remember the woman
who had tea with Paddington Bear and pulled a
marmalade sandwich from her purse like Beyoncé
might pull hot sauce from her bag.
Tomorrow, I will work to dismantle the supremacy
that bonded her life to mine-neither demonising nor
idolising her life. Instead, I will see it for the beauty
that it was and also it’s terror.
And I’ll extend mercy, knowing that someday when my time has come, l’d
like someone to mercifully weep, despite all that’s
terrible within me.
@Blackcoffeewithwhitefriends
https://linktr.ee/blackcoffeewithwhitefriends
Join us in helping to bring reality and decency back by SUBSCRIBING to our Youtube channel:
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCQ1Ll1ylCg8U19AhNl-NoTg
and SUPPORTING US where you can: Award Winning Independent Citizen Media Needs Your Help. PLEASE SUPPORT US FOR JUST £2 A MONTH
