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Saturday, November 23, 2024

The Marsh Family are cooking it

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The Marsh family has become a musical and political inspiration. Mixing huge talent for musicianship and songwriting, they are setting the internet alight. They consist of parents, Ben and Danielle Marsh, who met at Cambridge University, and their children, Alfie, Thomas, Ella, and Tess Marsh. The family lives in Faversham, a town in Kent.

The following are just a couple of examples of this amazing family.

A Parody of Keir Starmer’s Labour Party

The iconic “Starman” was the lead single (recorded and released in 1972) on the late, great, David Bowie’s album The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars, though it was actually a late addition to the album. The idea was a message of hope coming to Earth’s youth from an alien. We don’t know where a message of hope is coming from these days, and as the lyrics suggest, there certainly hasn’t really been one fully mapped out yet by the Labour Party, who are currently leading in the UK polls in a general election year. In fact, we don’t even know when the general election is going to be. But we’re hoping both parties don’t wallow in a cesspit of negative messaging and actually put forward a vision for the future that is more than platitudes or self-evident clichés. Hoping, but not expecting. If you want a sense of where both leaders currently sit in the rankings, then there’s this: https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/av/uk-poli…. The other inspiration behind this song is the Flight of the Conchords’ “Bowie’s in Space,” which was essential listening as the kids grew up, and “pointy nipple antennae” remains a household phrase.

Singalong:

INTRO
Labour now
Looking good

VERSE 1
Didn’t know who Starmer was and his base was low
He seemed bland on the radio
Looked set for stayin’ down in
All the polls – not a lotta cred
Then the Tories did seem to fade
Still had quite a slow voice and a careful turn of phrase
There were some cliches
That were vexing Corbynites

CHORUS
Keir Starmer’s waiting for his try
He’d like to honour pledges
But he might just change his mind
Keir Starmer’s rating’s pretty high
He’s worried that he’ll blow it
So he fence-sits for a while
To simply
Let the Tories lose it
SNP abuse it
Get all the Lib-Dems’ MPs

VERSE 2
He’s had to claim somehow that he’ll stick to fiscal rules
Hey, that’s far out, just don’t tax the private schools
Each time on TV he’ll be bigging up his Dad made tools
Stuck out in limbo he can’t be forthright
He only sparkles when the glitter’s thrown on site
Won’t insult Thatcher for he’s chasing the Centre Right

Keir Starmer’s waiting for his try
He’s better than the others
But the bar’s not very high!
Keir Starmer’s skating on thin ice
He knows that there’s no budget
And there won’t be for a while!
And so he
Hopes that Sunak loses
Hopes the public chooses
Based on their sense of fury

Starmer’s waiting for his try
He’d like to come and lead us
But he’s rather vague on why
Keir Starmer makes no battle-cry
And based on all the polling
It’s been working for a while
And maybe
Yes – the Far Left boos him
GB News abuse him
But why reveal some policies?

La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la

A Parody of those who scream “Woke”

What does ‘Woke’ mean? People seem to be struggling to define the term ‘woke’—a concept at the heart of the raging culture wars in many countries and on social media platforms. It is likely to be central to the big elections of 2024. We take this matter very seriously, and after some extensive research and soul-searching, we would like to share this public service explainer song, fronted by a puppet orangutan (called Ori Ori), involving cult-like children, and featuring an amateurish experimental green screen. Ori Ori would be happy to debate any of the definitions or issues raised in the song, with anyone in the media who might help him to improve his profile, as in spite of being a terrible excuse for a character, having a questionable accent, and not possessing a working larynx or brain, he is a firm believer in free speech and self-promotion.

Singalong:

Once upon a time, when you had something on your mind
And it was making you a little sad inside
You’d have to try your best to find
How to express that state of mind
By using words, explaining issues – had to consider either side

But now we’ve made a leap
That means you never have to pause
You can just plough right on
(Doesn’t mean you’re right, of course)
But it carries such a force
And you’re freed of all remorse

You just call it woke!
You just shout it woke!
Like when an obstacle’s presented
Or you didn’t get a joke
When the WiFi’s broke (woke!)
You don’t like some bloke (woke!)
It’s mirrors and it’s smoke
Cos there’s no such thing as …

There’s no such thing as witches
It’s something that is learned
(But tell that to the tens of thousand menopausal women that they burned)
There’s no such thing as banshees
A figment of belief
(But helpful to control annoying children when they give you too much grief)

If enough of us repeat it
It will never be revoked
It’s a semiotic automatic weapon
When provoked
If you’re worried about progress – liked the days when gays were straight
You can do the wokey-cokey and you don’t seem too irate

You just call it woke!
You just shout it woke!
It’s an anagram of “we ok”
To other other folk
You can print it: woke!
You don’t think just “woke”
It’s mirrors and it’s smoke
Cos there’s no such thing as…

There’s no such thing as Krampus
Who pops up now and then
In folklore you find Baba Roga, Baba Yaga
Lots of Bogeymen
Traditions, myths and stories
Passed down for centuries
But luckily we’ve cooked up something quicker
That’s in all our dictionaries

Now, words can change their meanings
You’ve probably seen it done
Like “sick”’s become a good thing
Or like, “like”’s the latest “um”
But we’ve really hit the jackpot
With this shorthand for our woes
It’s the bollocks to look out for
In the Emperor’s New Clothes

You just call it woke!
You just shout it woke!
Like when a car runs out of petrol
Or a peanut makes you choke
License got revoked? (woke!)
Climate change invoked? (woke!)

If you think that history’s broke
It might save you from a stroke
When you’re filling up with rage and want to cry
So let us all inveigh it
Doesn’t matter where you say it
It’s an ironic addition
To a sense of lost tradition
Doesn’t show much erudition
But who needs a definition?!
You can’t touch it, you can’t be it
But you know it when you see it
Share the hoax, share the joke
Sing it: woke!

Instruments:

Vocals: Ben, Danielle, Alfie, Thomas, Ella, Tess
Cornet: Ella
Clarinet: Thomas
Violin: Tess
Piano: Alfie
Guitar, Banjo, Percussion: Ben

If you loved this, please leave the family a tip in the jar at: https://paypal.me/marshfamilysongs

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