Here now is the latest edition of “We`re Schools – Don`t Laugh”
I remember being in East Germany in the mid-80s, where it was pretty clear that Honecker and his goons were not to be laughed at, not even by chancer hippies passing through.
The powerful do NOT like comedy, mockery or satire. And today’s powerful seem last to have laughed, only when Baroness Thatcher of Kesteven died in April 2013.
So The Left /Liberal nexus of Commissars and Commissioners, Inspectors of Virtuous Rectitude and Approved, Licensed Thinkings will NOT like much of what I`m going to say.
So it simply HAS to be said.
I work as a sub teacher around Dorset for my many sins. And one of me berths only recently decided not to collect food for Harvest Festival time any more for the usual reasons. Which boils down to “Why the hell should the old get free food, now they`re voting Brexit”?
I joke of course, but not by much.
So this year-with tramps raiding the food banks to sell on, with the old not wanting a box of old Latvian horseballs in an EU jar ,which may have killed their dog a few years back? What then would be the do-gooders “feem toon” THIS year…what motif , what virtue signals would be coming from the school THIS term?
So it was that F (upwardly mobile whirlybird on a fat salary, never teaching, but blizzards of plans on pastel paper) decides that-no, the poor can jog on-whitey causes all this poverty anyway by being racist and male, thick and money-grubbing in the private sector somewhere! What we need are “refugee tents” out in the sports fields for a long weekend, whilst the cameras show, local radio trot in and the local rag sends its intern to tap out the future for the Ages.
So tents we got-dozens of them , why even the head himself drove over to lie in one for ten minutes until Wessex FM had gone! As for the caretaker who`d have to put all these tents out, and then take them all down once the Beautiful People had been selfied with their hashtags? Poor sod had his Sunday taken up somewhere between the Somme and a Glastonbury disposal site before the rugby match for later in the week. But image is all-and though nobody used the opps and apps afforded to them beyond the school website-job done and result, Next job then F?
But there`s more-there nearly always is with liberal clowns too high up at the public teat!
So it was that only a fortnight later came the co-ordinated “Won`t someone think of the Calais Refugees” campaigns by the advocates, campaigners, charities, cheridees, qaungos and public sector knock-kneed sponges and suck ups locally. Spearheaded by the BBC / Channel 4 and broadsheets. So wouldn`t F be remiss, were she to let THAT frothing foaming surf wave go past without a body board and a local camera unit to record the schools niceness. Go School…yay! Indeed!
But none of those halal sensitivities for the lugenpresse , any risks of nasty conflabs with Shave the Children and their dietary imperialism must be nipped in the bud. So-no the minibus with the school logo on must NOT be stuffed from Tescos Value, not even Top Poundbury Duchy stuff .
So stay safe, stay neutral…yes folks, the vulnerable of Calais may once have complained to Jon Snow of bland continental fare , as purloined or donated from the French. So F`s idea-was to fill the van with SPICES. Turmeric, cumin, garlic and such like. No food-but what a range of condiments.
May well have passed without a laugh too, had their Spicy Merci Mission NOT coincided with the “clearing of the Calais Camp”…oh, the humanity!
Yes, spices ARE light-but would any backpacking refugees heading for Amiens and thence Paris have chosen to carry a sack of turmeric with them? Er, no.
But the spices went over, got seasick and came back-no takers even if offered as yellow cake drugs I`d imagine.
We therefore at the school fleeced our kids, took their money, badgered their parents, shunned their grannies and friends of a similar age to them. We filmed, photo`d, tagged and spoke /scribbled our Press Releases (don`t ask English to do it, they can hardly spell anymore!) and the caretaker, F and head all got some degree of fame on the website…and a week off for the poor caretaker for all the needless crap HE was put through for this virtue signal Festival of Rememberings.
And for what?…For my industrial scale jars of ginger that came home and were given to staff , so we`d not be facing the evidence of SLT stupidity in October 2016.
Ah well-yesterday was Stir Up Sunday-so we`ve got a good cake and puddings for the coming months anyhow…wonder if Donald Trump Or Nigel Farage would like some gingerbread men and a fine Thai curry?
Alicia Sinclair
