So Prime Minister,

Another case of a government MP who doesn’t have a sufficiently robust pair to allow him to face the criticism being rightfully levelled by his Christchurch constituents, eh?  And a Tory-controlled council looking to profit from the misery of people left without adequate defenses against flooding by your government.  All of the victims over 75 years of age, at that.  Tut, tut!  In the run-up to the 2015 election, they’ve just received a crystal clear demonstration of your Party’s true view of the welfare of the nation’s elderly folk.  And there was you trying to drum up grey support for your re-election too.  I think you can probably kiss the Q-Tip vote in Christchurch goodbye now, and seeing as it’s made national news via the internet source that most ordinary people read, you can probably wave goodbye to a hefty chunk of it elsewhere as well.

Maybe if you offered Mr “Wouldn’t Be Seen Dead Wearing Wellies” Chope an armed guard and a trench coat, like Psychosmiffy felt was necessary when he met those few disabled folks in the House, that might encourage him to get out and meet the voters?  After all, we all know how ferocious these old folks can be after a couple of self defence classes and a couple of hot toddies, right?

It looks, as well, as though you’ve been caught out in yet another lie too, as at least one Minister has contradicted your “money no object” statement with regard to the flood relief effort.  You’d think that with all those lovely shiny pennies that George is planning to withdraw from the Scots when they go their own merry way, there should be plenty available to spend on making and keeping English people safe, wouldn’t you?

Never mind, though.  You keep on hiding in your Carry On, Britain’s Rapidly Aquifying (COBRA) meetings, and let “Golden Rice” Paterson keep on denying that the climate’s changing in spite of what the Met Office experts (that’s people who know what they’re talking about) are saying to you and the Press.  Of course we all have faith that the power of your Party members’ combined denial of the weather facts will change those facts to suit your view of the world as it’s supposed to be.  I’m sure people up to their knees in disease-infested water will be happy to wait while you get your psychic metaconcert fine tuned and running properly so that all that manky  water magically disappears.  It has to work, or what land is Golden Rice ever going to have for his GMO masters to plant their poisonous seeds in, that no-one’s going to want to buy when they’ve grown up?

While you’re doing the psychic thing, your Tory colleagues in Christchurch Council can keep racking up the profits from their “Firty quid for four!! Gen-yoo-wine Heshun!! Get ’em while they’re still filled!!” sandbag outlet so that when the day comes when the sea finally submerges that constituency they can all rent places on higher ground at public expense.

That’s about the way things are set to go under your everlasting austerity regime, after all, right?

Sincerely,

Darren Lynch

https://uk.news.yahoo.com/no-time-climate-sceptics-paterson-faces-resignation-call-094301499.html

https://uk.finance.yahoo.com/news/no-money-flood-relief-says-112719522.html

https://tompride.wordpress.com/2014/02/13/tory-council-charges-7-50-a-sandbag-and-mp-refuses-to-meet-flood-hit-residents/https://uk.news.yahoo.com/scots-independence-uk-veto-currency-union-005138469.html 

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