I have heard of election giveaways, but this one must beat every other one ever, anywhere.

And it costs absolutely nothing. No a penny. In fact, because the Conservatives have not spent a penny (lots of promises, though), we now have the luxury of staying at home and paddling and swimming without having to pollute the air with aircraft fumes.

Not only do we get free swimming pools, but we also save the planet from increased carbon dioxide levels and the zillions it will cost to live some sort of existence in the coming decades and centuries.

Anyone who thought the Tories did not care and were just a bunch of sociopaths and psychopaths feathering their own nests should get a slap on the wrist (metaphorical is best).

How have they done it?

The wait is nearly over. The suspense is at its boiling point.

Wait no longer, as the first images for their election leaflets have been leaked.

Absolute genius, eh?

Admittedly, there are drawbacks, as I have identified below, but aren’t there always?

  1. Safety hazards: Potholes can pose significant safety risks for motorists, cyclists, and pedestrians. Sudden and unexpected encounters with potholes may lead to accidents, especially if drivers swerve to avoid them or lose control of their vehicles.
  2. Vehicle damage: Potholes can cause extensive damage to vehicles. Hitting a pothole at high speeds or with low tire pressure can result in flat tires, bent rims, suspension damage, and other issues, leading to costly repairs for vehicle owners.
  3. Increased maintenance costs: Potholes necessitate frequent and costly maintenance for road authorities. Repairs involve filling the potholes with asphalt or other materials, and the constant need for maintenance can strain budgets for local municipalities or government agencies. (Obviously, this one is irrelevant.)
  4. Traffic congestion: Repairs to potholes often require lane closures or roadblocks, leading to traffic congestion and delays for commuters. This can impact daily commutes, delivery schedules, and overall transportation efficiency.
  5. Negative impact on infrastructure: Potholes contribute to the deterioration of road infrastructure. Over time, if left unattended, they can lead to more extensive damage to the road surface and its underlying layers, requiring more extensive and costly repairs. (ie trillions of tonnes of concrete and tarmac).
  6. Environmental impact: Pothole repairs typically involve the use of materials like asphalt, which can have environmental consequences. The production and transportation of these materials contribute to carbon emissions, and the disposal of old materials may also pose environmental challenges. (New policy avoids this issue).
  7. Reduced property values: Areas with poorly maintained roads and numerous potholes may experience a decrease in property values. The condition of roads is often considered when evaluating the attractiveness of a neighborhood. (Think of being able to boast an outdoor swimming pool. (Although so can everyone, so that is less of a selling point.).
  8. Negative economic impact: Potholes can have indirect economic consequences, affecting businesses that rely on efficient transportation for the delivery of goods and services. Increased maintenance costs and delays in transportation can result in financial losses for businesses.
  9. Health impacts: The uneven road surfaces caused by potholes can contribute to discomfort and health issues for vehicle occupants. Pothole-related vibrations and jolts can cause physical stress and discomfort, particularly for those with pre-existing health conditions.
  10. Aesthetic concerns: Potholes contribute to a visually unappealing urban landscape. They can negatively impact the aesthetic appeal of streets and neighborhoods, influencing the overall perception of an area. (Unappealing? A swimming pool?).

Therefore, depending on your outlook, the glass is either half full or half empty, just like the swimming pools. Everyone wins!

Jason Cridland

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